The Humphries Family: May 2011

And three weeks later, I present to you... the birth story. :)

I was born at "home." In this beauty of a room. It was actually at my grandparents' home.
In fact, my mom had all five of her children at home. So the thought of having a home birth was a concept that I was completely comfortable with. When I became pregnant with our first child, I really wanted to consider having a home birth, but John was very not comfortable with the idea, especially for our first baby. So we decided to have our baby at the hospital, and I hired a wonderful doula. (Joseph's birth story here) Also, with our first baby, John really wanted the sex to be a surprise. Well, that was an idea that I was not comfortable with because I felt like I would feel too unprepared not knowing if we were having a boy or a girl. So we found out the sex. So this time around, we switched. I was absolutely determined to have a home birth with our second baby even before I was pregnant. And thankfully, John was willing to go along with it. And since I was getting my way on where to have the baby, I was totally willing to let John have his way with keeping the sex of the baby a surprise. We received tons of hand me down girl clothes from John's sister, and if we had a boy, I still had everything from Joseph. Preparedness, check.

Before I was even pregnant, I had researched my options of midwives in this area and had settled on my choice of Elizabeth Smith. After talking with her on the phone and meeting her in person, I felt especially good about our choice of having a home birth and was really looking forward to the whole experience. I see childbirth as a beautiful and sacred experience. I am completely confident in trusting my body to do what it was created to do naturally. I'm not afraid of experiencing the pain associated with childbirth because I believe and have experienced that my mind has power over my body in helping it to deal with pain. I love the concept of having my baby at home, in an environment that I control, where I'm not subjected to someone else's rules and regulations. I believe that having a baby is a completely normal, natural and healthy event and feel that by having the birth at home I'm maximizing the joyful potential of the whole experience. I am very grateful for modern medicine and have nothing against it. I feel it is so important to trust my spiritual guide throughout the whole process. I trust that if there were, or may be with future pregnancies, complications that would necessitate more specialized care that a hospital and staff can provide, that my spirit would be in tune with that need and I would follow that intuition. I felt completely at peace throughout my pregnancy about having this baby at home and both John and I are so happy with how everything turned out.

...
So I drank my special castor oil smoothie around noon on April 20th and waited around for the effects of it. (Of which I was really not looking forward to because I really hate pooping.) Nothing seemed to be happening. Then I finally started experiencing the laxative effect around 8pm. We went for a walk around the neighborhood around 9pm and throughout the walk I was noticing that I was having regular (not painful, but regular) contractions. When we got back home we put in a movie, The Man Who Knew Too Little. I was cross stitching during the movie and was still experiencing regular contractions. About half way through the movie, they began to be painful enough that I had to set my stitching on my lap and focus on my breath as I calmly breathed through them. Around 11pm I asked John to start timing them for me. By the time the movie was over we looked at what John had been recording about my contractions and decided we'd better call Liz. They were averaging about 3 minutes apart and about 1 minute long. I was finally in active labor!

I called Liz around 12:30am and described how I was feeling. I had the thought to try and see if I could fall asleep and let my contractions do their work in my sleep. She told me it would take her about 45 minutes to get to my house so to be sure to call her with enough time for her to get there. She nor I thought she had to come right then, so she told me to call her if anything changed: the contractions became more intense in pain or even if they slowed down and/or stopped. I agreed and hung up. I changed into my "labor gown" I had chosen and got as far as the side of my bed before realizing that I probably was not going to be getting any sleep right then. The contractions seemed to be quickly becoming more intense. I was still able to walk around the house and breathe through the contractions, but I wasn't able to talk during them anymore. I called Liz about an hour later and told her to come over. She and her apprentice, Shannon arrived at about 2:15am. They found me sitting on what I called my potty throne. Since I was still experiencing the effects of the lovely smoothie from earlier, I found it best to sit with a flushable hole underneath my rear. My mom propped up some pillows behind my back and my head and I found it was quite comfortable to labor there.
Soon after she arrived, I made my way over to my bed and Liz checked me and found I was dilated to a 5 and about 80% effaced. I went back to my potty throne and labored there for a bit more. Liz set up camp on the floor in front of my bed, getting everything ready for the delivery. John warmed up some cloths in a crock pot full of hot water and would place them on my belly during a contraction. The warmth, along with the pressure of his hands helped me through the pain. During contractions I would breathe deeply in through my nose and then exhale through my mouth, until Liz asked if I was getting lightheaded. She suggested it would be better to exhale through my nose, and make as low of noises as I could. I took her advice and it really helped. I felt like I would simply fall away into my own distant world each time a contraction came. I was able to focus solely on my breathing and the sounds I was making. I do remember thinking that the contractions were getting pretty hard and feeling a little apprehensive about how I was going to make it through them once it really got farther along and closer to delivery. I wasn't looking forward to being able to handle much more pain than I was already experiencing.

Thankfully, I didn't have to. Liz checked me again and found me dilated to an 8. She said, "An 8 is pretty much a 10!" implying that this baby was going to be coming soon. I was really excited. I was laboring so well with just John's help there on my potty throne that Liz and Shannon went in the other room, ready to see if they could nap a little. She told me to pay attention to if I felt any pressure on my cervix or felt the urge to push. With each contraction I would visualize my cervix opening up and the baby descending and pretty soon I realized there was a real pressure there on my cervix. I didn't feel the urge to push right then, but I felt the urge to feel the urge to push and quietly told John, "I think it's time." He was surprised and elated and hurried to get Liz.

I got up from my throne and barely made it into my room before another contraction hit me, and it was hard. Liz was right there and had me put my arms around her neck where I just hung on for dear life. I felt my body slowly convulse towards the end of the contraction and knew this was it. When it was over she helped me get comfortable on the floor and while we were sitting there waiting for the next contraction my eyes filled up with tears of gratitude and anticipation because I knew I would have my baby in my arms soon. Liz saw my tears and said, "Don't be scared." I said, "I'm not. I'm just happy."

Another contraction began and Liz asked John if he wanted to catch the baby and he said, "no, that's all right." Well, Liz doesn't take no for an answer and said, "You're going to catch the baby. Come over here." He slid over next to her and she was just telling him where to put his hands and how to catch the baby when my body started pushing and pushing hard. I knew I could push that baby out right then, and that's exactly what I did while Liz was saying, "Wait! Wait! Never mind." as she caught the baby and gave her to John who passed her up to me.
Liz said, "I'm not going to tell you the sex, you'll have to see for yourself." As John handed her up to me I cried softly, "It's a girl!" Then a few seconds later it dawned on me that her head was absolutely full of hair and I said, "She's got hair!" They wiped her off, put a hat on her and wrapped a blanket around her while John and I admired our beautiful daughter.
Then Liz prepped her to have her umbilical cord cut and asked John if he wanted to do it. At first he said "no" again, but then he relented. That was one thing he said he regretted not doing when Joseph was born. And Kaili's cord was surprisingly pencil thin.
After cutting the cord, I delivered the placenta and we spent more time admiring her while Liz stitched me up. I did tear with this delivery, a second degree tear compared to the third degree one I had with Joseph. Liz thought that I wouldn't have even torn if I hadn't had pushed her out all in that one push. But I was glad I did. I wanted to have her born asap.
I laughed and asked if anyone thought I had woken up our neighbors. (We share a bedroom wall with them.) They all shook their head no. Liz later said that I had been laboring so quietly that they didn't think I was serious when I said it was time! Even when I delivered the baby, it was with a long grunt, not a scream. Joseph slept soundly through the whole event in the other room. My quiet labor and delivery was so different compared to the labor and delivery I had in the hospital with Joseph where I'm sure my screams convinced more than a few souls never to have a child... at least not without an epidural! My mom helped me change my gown and then I held Kaili to breastfeed for the first time. She suckled wonderfully. Then it was her turn to get all cleaned up, weighed and measured.
Our beautiful little daughter, Kaili Anne, was born at 3:41am, after just 4 hours of active labor, on April 21st, 2011. (Kaili is pronounced "Ky lee") She weighed 6lbs 6oz and was 19.5" long. (Pretty small for being a week overdue!) By 5:30 in the morning everything was cleaned up, we were all settled into bed together, ready to go to sleep, and Liz and Shannon left for home.

Here's my fabulous birth team:

Elizabeth Smith, midwife

Shannon Olds, midwifery apprentice

John Humphries, my labor assistant and best husband ever

Emily VanDyke, my wonderful mother responsible for all the beautiful pictures

It was such a wonderful, beautiful experience. I absolutely loved having our baby at home. And even John is totally sold on it and says we'll have our next one at home too.

Our second baby was due on April 14th and throughout the beginning of that week, I was feeling the Braxton-Hicks contractions more frequently than I had up to that point and I was becoming very hopeful that the baby would be born sometime that week. My mom, anxious to not miss the birth, decided to come down a day earlier than she had planned and was here on the 12th. And thus began the walking. I was walked all over the place every day in hopes of getting those contractions going. All it seemed to do was wear me out, although I really did enjoy the evening walks with my family. Joseph absolutely loved all the time he got to spend outside.

This was taken on Monday night, before my due date. We had a little family home evening talking about the new little baby that would soon be coming into our family.

At my prenatal appointment on the 12th, I was a little more effaced than the week prior, but hadn't dilated any more. My midwife expected me to go at least another week, but said she would strip my membranes if I came in later in the week. So the day I was due I went in. She said it took me to about a small 3 and that I was about 70% effaced. I asked her about taking castor oil because I was getting a lot of pressure from my mom to take some. She had taken two doses with her last baby and after taking a nap, it brought on her labor so quickly that the baby was born in 20 minutes! I didn't want the baby to come that fast! My midwife didn't really think the castor oil would work for me if I took it then but said to let her know if I did decide to take it. On the way home, John and I stopped at the pharmacy and I was holding it in my hands debating on whether or not to buy some. I finally decided not to and put it back on the shelf. Back to more walking.

These were taken the day before my due date.

The next day we went for a hike up at Red Cliffs and I was having such an enjoyable time and feeling so great that it was a little hard to believe I was actually past my due date!

My mom's idea... the rock in the background looks like my pregnant belly.

Seriously. Can he get any cuter?

Yeah, he can.

Joseph really enjoyed the hike and playing in all the sand, rocks and water.

It was really nice having my mom with us for that time before the baby came. She got to spend a lot of time playing with Joseph. In fact, Joseph spent so much of his days with his grandma helping him out that when he talked to me he kept accidentally calling me Grandma instead of Mom! She would make a blanket tent for him in the mornings, blow bubbles with him, draw outside with sidewalk chalk and go for walks to the park with him. I know Joseph really enjoyed being able to spend all that time with her.

I love this picture... shows so much of his personality and things he likes right now. My mom took it underneath the blanket tent she had made for him. He's sitting in the bumbo, which although it's for babies, he absolutely LOVES to sit in. He's got his bear next to him and he's really been loving stuffed animals lately and always brings them to us and says, "Hi Joseph!" wanting us to take the animal and pretend like it is talking to him. And he's also got a little musical toy that I found at the DI recently that he loves. He is really into anything musical.

Another week went by since my last prenatal and so on the 19th we went in again to see how things were progressing. We found that they weren't really. However, this time, my midwife said that if I did decide to take the castor oil now that it would probably shave at least 4 or 5 days off of our waiting time. That cinched it for us and we purchased some on the way home with the intent of me taking a dose the next morning. John made me a smoothie mixed with 1/4 cup of castor oil that I drank around 11:45am on Wednesday. We were hoping to notice some sort of effect after around 4 hours, but alas, there was nothing. I wasn't having any contractions and was feeling just fine. I had been meaning to take some pregnant belly pictures with all our hands on my tummy, but hadn't done so yet. Even though I was feeling fine, there was a little something inside me that said I'd better take those pictures now or forever lose the chance. So we did and it's a good thing because by the next morning my belly was no longer pregnant!